This month hasn't been the greatest so far. With our vacation and the holidays in December, I felt like I worked part-time (probably because I basically did work part-time).
So when January started, I told myself it was back to the grind time. I was meal-planning a week at a time, getting back into the groove at work, keeping the house clean. I was refreshed from having so much time off last month.
But of course, it only took me about 1 week to remember why I hate my job. And then I got called for Jury Duty. And then my grandma got really really sick and I had to drive 3 hours one way in a blizzard so I could see her before she passed. And then she didn't pass (but it has been touch and go and I am convinced that doctors know nothing) and I got stuck on two (yes two) jury trials that I have to go back for at the end of the month.
Then yesterday was Dave's birthday, but my boss (who is never in town) was in town and I had a bunch of meetings so I didn't get home until later than I wanted to. And we were supposed to go out for a very nice dinner tonight and my mom called me this morning to tell me that my grandma is indeed dying and they don't expect her to make it through the weekend. So dinner is cancelled and I feel terrible.
And then I started thinking of everything that is on my plate at work this coming week and I figure I am going to be out at least 1 or 2 days for the funeral and there is this huge meeting where a bunch of people are flying in and what if I have to miss it. I know you are probably thinking, who cares about work when there are family issues to be tended to? And that is mostly how I feel, but honestly I have been so unengaged at work that I was already feeling guilty about it so while I could care less about missing the meeting, I feel guilty about not caring. Does that even make sense?
I really am over January. Really. And it is only the 16th.
1 comment:
It makes perfect sense. You have too many irons in the fire and there is nothing you can do about it. It is too bad you can not work part of your week, from home. Like go to the office MWF and work from home on TTH. At least then you will feel a bit more grounded. Even if you still have to sit at your computer, you can sit in comfy jammies, and slippers, listening to whatever you want to listen to, and still be productive. It would probably change your whole mindset.
I too am in a funk. I haven't been following my meal plan, my online class started and I haven't done a thing with it yet, and... I'm worn out. It is only January 17th.
I am very, very sorry to hear about your Grandma. This is your mom's mom???
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