tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11912053626710968122024-03-04T23:16:18.109-05:00Once Upon a Time....Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.comBlogger251125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-1005288261980561772010-05-27T08:28:00.003-04:002010-05-27T08:32:53.852-04:00Dear People on the Fringes of my LifeDear Mail Carrier,<br /><br />I appreciate your delivering of my mail every day (except Sundays and Holidays and while we are on the subject why do I have to work Presidents Day and <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">MLK</span> day when you do not?). And I also appreciate the fact that it is possible that some folks do not keep the area surrounding their mailbox in good shape. However, my mailbox is unblocked and there is nothing keeping you from pulling right up next to it. So, would it be possible that you not hurl my mail in such a way that it is thrust all the way to the far back of the mailbox? I drive a tiny Chevy Malibu and even though I have very long limbs, it is nearly impossible for me to reach the mail from my vehicle unless I hang halfway out the window and even then one piece of mail inevitably falls out of the stack and onto the ground where the wind picks it up and carries it halfway across the neighborhood. Thanks.<br /><br />Dear Parent of other teenager in the Neighborhood,<br /><br />When our kids have a verbal conflict, could you please pick up the phone and call me first to discuss before you call the State Police? I promise you that 99.9% of the time we will resolve the conflict on our own. I really don’t appreciate having a 7 foot tall police officer ringing my doorbell during dinner. Thanks.<br /><br />Dear 4<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> grade Teacher,<br /><br />I got your e-mail with the link to the United States 50 States quiz and I took it myself to see if I am smarter than a 4<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> grader. It turns out that I am not as I made silly mistakes like mixing up Arizona and New Mexico. I also could not remember where Iowa, New Hampshire, Connecticut and Massachusetts were (and I could not spell Massachusetts if my life depended on it). I promise you that I will keep studying and so will my 4<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">th</span> grader. We are a family eager to learn. Thanks.<br /><br /><br />Yours Truly,<br /><br />Melanie<br /><br />PS if any of you want to try out your United States States skills, click <a href="http://www.lizardpoint.com/fun/geoquiz/usaquiz.html"><span style="color:#cc33cc;">here</span></a>.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-75837712086165189942010-05-14T11:26:00.001-04:002010-05-14T11:30:08.433-04:00Orlando didn't make the top 10?Oh happy day. The sun is finally shining. My coffee even tasted better this morning and I find myself asking why anyone lives anywhere where the sun does not shine on a regular basis. This prompted me to Google the sunniest cities in the US. It turns out there are several websites that list this information, but none of them have the same list. However, there are a couple of cities that show up on all the lists and they are Phoenix, AZ; <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Las</span> Vegas, NV; Yuma, AZ; and El <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Paso</span>, TX.<br /><br />So, I am checking out real estate in those cities. I am also throwing in Denver, CO just because I want to and because I travelled there on business several years ago and have been infatuated with the city ever since. Something about looking out the window and seeing a mountain made me pee my pants with pleasure and I have never been able to get the image out of my head.<br /><br />I dream of just picking up and relocating. More than you know. However, the biggest things holding me back from that are that I married a man with kids whose mother, while basically uninterested in the daily events of her children’s lives, their physical well-being, or their financial well being (other than to buy them things that get her “points” such as cell phones, concert tickets and drum sets), would never consent to allowing us to take them out of the state, and our house is worth way less than we paid/owe on it. So in Michigan we stay. For now at least.<br /><br />In other news, I would like to report <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">publicly</span> that after a 2<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">ish</span> year hiatus from yoga, I believe the time has come for me to return to the practice. I feel like my life has fallen out of balance. I am worrying too much about things over which I have no control. I am using sleeping pills too many nights. I am grumpy too many days. I don’t feel like I am growing spiritually and in fact, may have actually regressed. I spend money foolishly. And I am just not exercising enough. Blah, blah, blah. Less talk more action and that is all I am saying about that.<br /><br />It is going to be beautiful in Michigan this weekend and I am looking forward to it. It has rained incessantly over the past three weekends so we are more than due for this. Wherever you are, I hope you also enjoy your weekend!Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-53737852663067047982010-05-13T09:25:00.001-04:002010-05-13T09:27:45.141-04:00Roll on Four Wheeled MalibuThis is likely to be an aimless post, so I apologize in advance.<br /><br />Tuesday I had a meeting in Columbus. That would be in Ohio. I live in Michigan (just in case that was not clear). I was not feeling up to the hotel stay this time so I had the very bright and ambitious idea that I would get up really early and drive to Columbus, attend the meeting and then drive home. Thus my trip did not require me to pack my make-up, my blow-dryer, my very expensive and prone to wrinkling business attire, two pairs of dress shoes, 6 pairs of underwear (because that is how many I take for one night), pajamas, two pairs of socks, my running shoes, my ipod, and the charger for my cell phone, my ipod, my gps and my vibrator.<br /><br />I’m kidding about the vibrator. I was seeing if you are paying attention. My vibrator does not have a charger. It takes batteries.<br /><br />Back to the meeting in Columbus. I got up at 3:30. Well, wait, lets back up. I woke up at 2 with a splitting headache, got up took some Advil, went back to sleep and then got up again at 3:30 and left my house at 4:20. The drive to Columbus is about 3 ½ hours, but with rush hour traffic in Columbus, it took me about 4. I was actually pretty impressed with myself as I was able to drink my entire travel mug of coffee and I never had to stop and pee.<br /><br />So, I got there about 8. Did I mention it was pouring rain almost the entire drive? The meeting was from 9-4. I left Columbus at 4:20 and drove the 3 ½ hours home putting me home about 8:30 (I had to stop to grab some dinner, I was starving). I did pretty well with the help of a book on CD that I purchased at Barnes and Noble the day before and which I have only made it about halfway through but which I am enjoying immensely. The book is Eat, Pray, Love. I only made it to the beginning of Pray.<br /><br />Yesterday I felt like I had been run over by a truck. Apparently I am not cut out for 17 hour days where I am sitting stationary for 95% of it. Or maybe just 17 hours days in general? I don’t know, but yesterday sucked. I was so cranky and I wanted to beat some ones ass. My husband and my step-son both got to be the lucky recipients of a verbal beating (not that maybe they did not deserve it, but usually I am more diplomatic).<br /><br />Anyway, today it is back in the saddle. I wanted to post something profound, maybe some poetry which has been parading through my head the past couple days but which always manages to escape when I sit down to type it out.<br /><br />Oh this oppressive rain. It won’t stop and I miss the sun. It is May 13 for crikey’s sake, shouldn’t the April showers have moved on their way by now? I have some really cute sandals that are begging to be worn.<br /><br />In other news, Saturday will mark the 8 year anniversary of employment with my current company. My professional life is officially stagnant.<br /><br />But I do get 3 weeks of vacation.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-78166976797960383812010-05-07T16:32:00.001-04:002010-05-07T16:33:18.066-04:00I had an incident at work today with some donuts. You see, they (the donuts) called my desk from the kitchen and told me that if I did not get in there and eat them ASAP, then there would be dire consequences. Well, I didn’t want anyone to get hurt so I immediately went in there and ate the donuts. Then I was so hopped up on the sugar that I came back to my desk and promptly dumped iced tea all over my keyboard. And then my computer freaked out and opened about 47 internet pages and I could not do a ctrl/alt/delete because my keyboard wouldn’t work (because of the iced tea I think) and I had to instead shut the computer down by holding down the power button. <br /><br />All this because I had to eat a donut. I’m racked by guilt and remorse. You have to understand that I have not been eating much sugar the past few months (ya know since that bitch the Wii fit told me that I am 713lbs over weight) and even before that I really didn’t eat donuts. I don’t know what came over me today, but I am wracked with guilt. <br /><br />(And this post is getting posted 3 hours after I started typing it because I had to go track down a new keyboard so mine can hopefully spend the weekend drying out and then will work again on Monday. Hopefully. Because this keyboard I am typing on now is not the fancy smancy split keyboard like I have and I can’t get used to a new keyboard all over again!)Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-14459174714095488622010-05-05T15:14:00.000-04:002010-05-05T15:17:19.035-04:00Happy Cinco de Mayo!In lieu of a margarita, I am, at this moment, enjoying my very first iced latte of the year. It’s getting that warm outside. Yay. And I am wearing open toed shoes and white pants. <br /><br />Now if only I could somehow work in some palm trees, a 5 star resort and a pristine and sparkling swimming pool……Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-60505062376444981372010-05-02T20:44:00.002-04:002010-05-02T20:56:13.650-04:00**Warning** if you have never seen the Lion King, this post contains spoilers. And, go watch it. Please.<br /><br />Next time I go on a crazy rant like that, would someone please remind me how wine makes things so much better?!<br /><br />I'm halfway through a bottle of <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">merlot</span> right now and it is making me h-a-p-p-y.<br /><br />Becca is watching The Lion King right now. We were supposed to be watching The Princess and the Frog, but when we put it in to play, we discovered that the disc was cracked. So back to <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Netflix</span> it is going, but I had to quickly offer up a different Disney movie. I wanted The Little Mermaid, but she picked The Lion King. I can live with that.<br /><br />She's cute. She started crying when <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Mufasa</span> died.<br /><br />I don't know how you feel about Disney movies, but I myself am partial to what I refer to as the best four Disney movies ever made, The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, The Lion King and Aladdin. Oh yes. <br /><br />Wow, this wine is really making me happy. <br /><br /><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Simba</span> just took his rightful place as King after killing the evil Scar. **Sigh**<br /><br />Okay, I also wanted to mention that I do listen to Drew and Mike and I was so glad when Drew came back, however, sometimes when they really start talking about boobs or B<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">utt</span> Mike shows up or they are on commercial, I do flip over to Fox News.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-86794704418491316712010-04-30T09:24:00.002-04:002010-05-01T12:03:14.621-04:00Friday morning rantPlease allow me to rant this morning. It is Friday and has been a long week and I spend too much time in the car listening to talk radio and am stressed out on the verge of major decisions in my life. And I haven’t slept enough.<br /><br />Here are the things that have me ranting this morning.<br /><br />#1 I read an article this morning about how the state of Michigan is going to have to cancel 100 road projects originally slated for 2011 because they are experiencing a shortfall of $84 million dollars in their budget. Really? Could it be because half the state is unemployed and people are leaving the state in droves and the city of Detroit is a shadow of its once booming self? Is it me or when your income is reduced, you should also reduce your spending? It seems obvious to me that the state would have to cut some spending somewhere to make up for the loss of revenue. Not rocket science. It just seems like everything I turn around I am reading about another local government that is bankrupt or on the verge of it. The state of California, the city of Detroit. Come on, how hard is this concept? Less money coming in, less money going out.<br /><br />#2 President Obama said in a speech this week that at some point some people have made “enough money.” Can someone tell me how much is enough money? Because I’<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">ve</span></span> got to tell you, I don’t think I will ever have enough money. I understand that some people have more money than I could even ever imagine, but oh fucking well. Maybe Michigan should confiscate some of that money to pay for the $84 million shortfall in their road construction budget. That would be the fairest thing to do, I mean you should see some of the houses around here. They’re huge and the people living in them are obviously gluttons and have more money than they know what to do with.<br /><br />#3 Right now, there is a case going on in the county I live in where a 4 year old boy was beaten to death over the course of 4 days by his mother’s live-in boyfriend as a punishment for wetting his pants while sitting on the couch. It turns out that not only had the mother come and gone from the apartment over the course of the beatings, but several other people had as well and while a couple of them mentioned that she should take the boy to the hospital, none of them called the police or 911 or anything (including the mother). It makes me ill. Both the boyfriend and the mother are being charged with murder, but the defense attorney for the guy is running around saying that he (the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">pos</span></span> boyfriend) is actually a schizophrenic and that the county knew about it and that they <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">didn</span></span>’t do anything to help. And now the attorney for the mother is asking for her to have a psych evaluation (to see if she is fit to stand trial). Both of these individuals have multiple drug convictions in their past and apparently one of the reasons that the mother <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">didn</span></span>’t want to take the boy to the hospital is because she <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">didn</span></span>’t want her parole officer to find out that she had moved. So my rant about this is that obviously both people are some sort of mentally disturbed, but the bottom line is that he barbarically beat a little boy to death (just to horrify you further, he burned the boys hands and feet, kicked him in the abdomen and head and poked his eyes and I’m guessing there is more detail that <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error"><span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">hasn</span></span>’t been released yet) and the mother out of whatever sort of fucked up self-absorption or apathy or drug haze stood by and did nothing about it. So, let’s stop this crap with the “why oh why did these people do this?” and get on with their trial. Quite frankly, I don’t really care if they are both crazy as loons, they killed a little boy. Put them away and throw away the key and be done with it.<br /><br />And, that’s all I have to say about that.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-67424107996727654292010-04-28T08:50:00.001-04:002010-04-28T08:54:27.071-04:00Kids and work haikus (harder than you think)Made kids wash dishes<br />They are whining about it<br />Have no sympathy<br /><br />Sitting at my desk<br />My oatmeal tastes like soap<br />I’ll eat it anyway<br /><br />Long drive in today<br />Feel like I live in my car<br />Lottery ticket?<br /><br />I have a meeting<br />The 17th one this week<br />Such a waste of timeMelaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-41285301412930887332010-04-26T08:36:00.003-04:002010-04-26T08:49:42.236-04:00Hormones aren't a girls best friendThis weekend two events happened to coincide. #1, The weather was dreary beyond belief, all weekend. The sun never made an appearance and it was kind of cold and it rained several times. And #2, I was suffering from PMS. Therefore, in general, I was cranky and irritable and mostly wanted to lay on the couch watching movies like <em>Willy <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">Wonka</span> and the Chocolate Factory</em> the Gene Wilder version, not the lame Tim Burton/Johnny <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">Depp</span> monstrosity and <em>Where the Heart is</em> which is the fabulous story where a young pregnant Natalie <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Portman</span> lives in the local <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Wal</span>-Mart until she gives birth, and <em>Somewhere in Time</em> because we are going to be going to the Grand Hotel and I need to watch it every time before we go, and also it is a wonderful chick flick that I can get my husband to watch because it involves time travel.<br /><br />I only got to watch Willy <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">Wonka</span>. There were a couple reasons for this, one being that it had come to my attention that my husband had never seen <em>Fight Club</em> and <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">Netflix</span> delivered, so I had to acquiesce and watch that.<br /><br />Some social obligations (baby shower and man-b-<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">que</span>) kept us from just staying in all weekend. Also, 14 almost 15 year old boy stayed home again this weekend (I actually cannot remember the last time he went to his mom’s for the weekend). I can’t bring myself to tell him he has to go, but if there was ever a weekend I should have done that, it was this one. He is not a bad kid, but he is 14 almost 15 and he is COOL. Being COOL manifests itself in a variety of ways, the most common involve making comments that are funny to the 14 almost 15 year old but no one else, having aforementioned comment for everything which sound strangely like back talking and playing drums on everything that is stationary. Combine the teenage coolness with my PMS and you have a recipe for “demonstrate to your 14 almost 15 year old that you wrote the book on sarcasm and that if he wants to spar, you most certainly are going to win.”<br /><br />By the time we started winding down last night, I was feeling tired and blue and dreading coming to work this morning. I started questioning every decision that I have ever made and feeling like nothing in my life is good. Of course, I can step outside of myself enough to know that this is the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">hormones</span> talking and that in a day or two (or a minute or two!) I will feel better. But I have to ask why this happens. Does anyone else think that hormonal mood swings and PMS seem to be a design flaw of women?Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-5575548384996829702010-04-21T08:22:00.000-04:002010-04-21T08:23:05.233-04:00What!? I'm a Secretary?Today is Administrative Professional Day. I realized this last night about 6:30 which required an emergency trip to Bath and Body Works to get gifts for my two assistants and Dave’s assistant. I don’t really like Bath and Body Works, but in the town I live in, there aren’t a lot of options at 7:30 on a weeknight that doesn’t require driving 25 minutes. I would rather have gotten gift certificates for a swanky restaurant or an upscale store at the mall, but I did manage to scrape together some decent gifts from the old BBW. <br /><br />(Sidenote: My senior year of college, I worked at the Bath and Body Works in the Mounds Mall. On my breaks, I used to eat the hell out of the pepperoni breadsticks at Luca Pizza along with a giant cherry coke and I wonder why I was fat in college.)<br /><br />So I got the gifts and was dismayed to discover that the only Hallmark store in town has gone belly up and was boarded up. So I had to run to Kohl’s to find gift bags to wrap the decent gifts I managed to scrape up from the BBW. I was happy to discover that Kohl’s entire gift bag stock has been marked down 50%, but worried that means they won’t be carrying gift wrap anymore. Where the frick am I going to buy wrapping paper now? Might this require me to actually plan ahead when gift giving? That might be a problem for me.<br /><br />All the running around for Administrative Professionals Day caused an involuntary trip down memory lane. Please come with me to a time approximately 12 years ago. I had graduated from college with a Bachelor’s degree in English and a minor in writing. I was aimless and unfocused and had no idea what sort of career I should pursue or even what I wanted. I was 22 years old and after some long painful months of unemployment, I landed a job at USA TODAY. Now you would think based on my degree that I would be doing some sort of writing or something that anything to do with that, but no. No, I my position was titled “Customer Service Associate” or “Customer Service Coordinator” or something like that. I was taking phone calls from home delivery customers who had complaints about their service along with a sundry of other office related tasks. It wasn’t exactly my dream job, but since I wasn’t really quite sure what my dream job was, I went with it.<br /><br />12 years ago Administrative Professionals Day was known by a different name. You might remember it. It was called Secretary’s Day. Okay, to recap, it is 12 years ago. I am working at USA TODAY. I have a degree but no direction. I started there in March and it is now April. 12 years ago. I am about 22 years old. I don’t like my job and am dealing with the letdown of clawing my way through 4 years of college only to find that I feel even more aimless than when I started only now I am $15,000 in debt with student loans and I making about $11/hr. Oh and I was driving a purple Ford Escort (a color I did not pick out but that is another story). It is Secretary’s Day and I come to work to find that I have been given flowers. Because I am a secretary. I didn’t know I was a secretary until that day and I called my mom blubbering. Oh my God, if I could travel back in time and slap that little girl upside the head. I would have told her to quit that fucking job and go find something that she loved to do and do it. I also would have told her to stay away from that guy (you know what guy I’m talking about).<br /><br />That was not a good day. And now you know way too much about me.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-51279692291969306882010-04-09T11:02:00.001-04:002010-04-09T11:11:35.607-04:00Cleanliness is next to what?We got home from vacation last Thursday and I am ashamed to admit that both of our suitcases are sitting on the bed in the spare bedroom open with clothes half unpacked and strewn about the room. I find that the spare bed has become more of another place for me to stash overflow clothes rather than a place for guests to sleep and in fact, the only time the bed gets cleared off is approximately one hour before we have a guest over.<br /><br />I have a. lot. of. clothes. It is ridiculous. Plus it is that time of year when I need to put the winter clothes away and get the rest of the summer stuff out. If I try to keep everything out all year, there <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">isn</span>’t enough room in my closet and bedroom furniture for everything. There is also an enormous amount of clutter in my nightstand drawers (books I read over a year ago, pictures, magazines, etc….), which if cleared, could provide an extra amount of space. But do you think I have jumped on that bandwagon yet? No, of course not. Because every night when I drag my sorry self home from this shit hole I call an office, the last thing I want to do is start organizing and trying to make the decision as to what I should get rid of. Maybe I need to watch an episode of Hoarders to inspire me.<br /><br />The other problem (I am full of excuses) is that I made a very very poor purchase of bedroom furniture when I was about 22. After I got out of college and moved back home to my parents house (not the best decision I ever made) I found myself unable to tolerate my childhood bedroom set which happened to be off-white with shiny brass trim that I once found beautiful and irresistible. So I got the bright idea that I would purchase a nice new bedroom set which I purchased interest free from a local furniture store and also happened to be solid oak and to call it huge would be an understatement. It was the floor model set so I got a really good deal and it included a headboard, <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">footboard</span>, dresser with <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">tri</span>-fold mirror, a nightstand and the biggest chest of drawers you have ever seen. It is three drawers across and about 7 or 8 rows high and it holds a lot of shit.<br /><br />The problem is that, with the exception of the bedroom at my parents house, I have never been able to fit the damn thing in any bedroom. It <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">wouldn</span>’t fit at my condo and when we bought our house, it sure <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">wouldn</span>’t fit in our bedroom. I hate it and I want to take a chainsaw and hack it up into little pieces and burn them one by one. It sat in my parent’s garage for years until, when we were moving into our current house, my dad seized the opportunity to force me to take delivery of it. Did I mention that it does fit in Sam’s room? Since he has no real bedroom set and only a twin bed, we were able to wedge it in there and now he has lots of space to store all his clothes and other little odds and ends. Did I mention the thing is solid oak and weighs about 700 lbs (that might be a slight exaggeration, but it is <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">f'ing</span> heavy!) even with the drawers all pulled out of it?<br /><br />I tried to sell the whole set a few years ago and Sam had a fit. Apparently he has bonded with the damn thing and now he refuses to part with it. So that leaves me a piece short in my bedroom and since I have to split the drawers in the dresser with Dave, I have a lot of overflow when it comes to clothes storage. Since I am <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">avoidant</span> when it comes to difficult decisions (like getting rid of clothes), I tend to just pile things up in the spare bedroom and shut the door.<br /><br />Okay, I’m getting depressed typing this. I had repressed the trauma of the giant dresser and actually was not thinking of it when I started this post. I thought I had made peace with the situation, but it turns out I haven’t. It’s a catch-22. If I don’t sell the existing set, I can’t afford to buy a new set. My husband <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">doesn</span>’t care if our room is an unfinished <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">hodge</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_9" class="blsp-spelling-error">podge</span> and every time I bring up buying a new set, he poo-poos it.<br /><br />I wonder if he’ll will show me how to use the chainsaw this weekend……Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-10958228272592651082010-04-08T15:05:00.003-04:002010-04-09T08:08:14.867-04:0010,000 years can give you such a crick in the neck!I snoozed for an hour and a half this morning. I think it goes without saying that I am having a hard time getting back on schedule from our vacation. All I can think about is sleep. I can’t get enough caffeine in my system and I had to go reload my Starbucks card. $4.08 triple <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">grande</span> lattes will eat up your balance so quick and they are only good for a half a day’s energy. Does anyone else notice that their pee smells like coffee after drinking Starbucks coffee or any strong coffee for that matter? Oh no? No one else? Well, me either. I just made that up ;)<br /><br />In other news, B-girl has been at her mom’s house this week (spring break) so it was been pretty quiet around our house. Sam is still there, but he is a lot less in your face than Becca.<br /><br />I booked <a href="http://www.grandhotel.com/"><span style="color:#990000;">the Grand Hotel </span></a>vacation I was talking about previously and I am so excited! I can’t wait to tell Becca when she gets home. She is going to be so excited. As you can see, I am doing everything I can to pass on my extravagant travel bug to her. Uh oh!Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-21691739979118634672010-04-06T08:41:00.000-04:002010-04-06T08:43:53.722-04:00Vegas ReportWe’re back from Vegas. Actually we got back last Thursday night, but two things have kept me from posting. #1 I have been recuperating and #2 We came home to find that our wireless router had died, therefore no i<span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-corrected">nternet</span> on my laptop. I hijacked Dave’s computer since he has broadband service, but I ran out of time before I could complete anything.<br /><br />So here’s the skinny on Vegas. This was our first time there and it was pretty much like we expected. In short, it was crazy. We had fun, but it was not relaxing. Also, two events occurred that put a little damper on the trip.<br /><br />#1 I sprained my foot. I use the word sprain not as any sort of technical medical diagnosis, but instead because I don’t know what else to call it. All I know is that I did something to my heel the first full day we were there which prevented me from walking on it <em>for the rest of the trip</em>. That kind of sucked, but I hobbled around anyway. And we took a few more cab rides than we normally would. A little heartbreaking as I adore walking, but I’m over it (kind of) (okay, truthfully, I am trying not to be bitter about it)<br /><br />#2 On our last night there, Wednesday night, I came down with either a wicked case of food poisoning or the stomach flu and was violently (and I mean violently) sick all night long. Ya’ll this is the sickest I ever remember being in my life and compounded by the fact that I was in a hotel, it left me begging for mercy. We considered staying an extra day because we <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">weren</span>’t sure if I would be able to leave the hotel or to board a plane. But I desperately wanted to go home and I think it was by sheer will that I stopped puking about an hour before we had to leave for the airport. It was not pretty and God bless my sainted husband who carried all our bags and supported me through the pain of airport check in and security. <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" class="blsp-spelling-error">Sidenote</span>: because of the 6 hours of puking and my completely empty stomach, I was afraid to take any Motrin which is what I had been using to numb the pain in my foot all week. So that left my foot throbbing and me only able to hobble my pathetic self through the airports in both <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_3" class="blsp-spelling-error">Las</span> Vegas and Detroit. That was the longest flight of my life.<br /><br />Not to say that we did not have some fun. We went to some nifty clubs (which made me feel old and why <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_4" class="blsp-spelling-error">didn</span>’t anyone tell me that I was supposed to buy a dress that only fell 1 inch below the bottom of my butt cheeks. I was very overdressed. And by overdressed, I mean that my dress feel well below by ass but well above my knees), we ate some good food (with the exception of possibly Wednesday night’s dinner – the jury is still out on if it was food poisoning or the flu), and we kept some good company (our friends over the weekend and my parents during the week). We also saw the Hoover Dam, the aquarium at Mandalay Bay and “O” the most amazing Cirque <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_5" class="blsp-spelling-error">de</span> <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_6" class="blsp-spelling-error">Soleil</span> show at the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_7" class="blsp-spelling-error">Bellagio</span>. Things we did not see that one or both of us wanted to see but we just ran out of time, The Erotica Museum (Dave), The Titanic Exhibition at the <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_8" class="blsp-spelling-error">Luxor</span> (me), Peepshow with Holly from Girls Next Door (Me), A titty bar (Dave), The Venetian (me).<br /><br />So Vegas left me kind of exhausted. I would post some pictures for you, but in my usual fashion, I kept forgetting to take the camera with me on our excursions, except for the Hoover Dam. Dave had the camera for most of that, so I am guessing that when I do get the pictures off of the camera, there will be about 100 pictures of the dam with no people in it. We’ll see, maybe he’ll surprise me.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-26920450951990710742010-03-23T08:54:00.000-04:002010-03-23T08:55:26.669-04:00I am so tired this week. Perhaps a combination of a stressful and sad week last week and fighting off some sort of sickness. All I know is that usually I wake up about an hour before my alarm goes off and then go in and out for the hour before it actually rings. Then I snooze a couple times. Yes, I have messed up sleeping habits. <br /><br />This week I have been sleeping hard right up until the alarm goes off and then I still snooze a couple times. I did not want to get out of bed this morning and was sure if I did that something terrible would happen. And it did, I stopped at Starbucks and got a triple grande latte (that is a grande latte with an extra shot of espresso in it for a grand total of 3 shots of espresso) and it is the worse latte I have ever had (with the exception of the one that tasted like the milk had gone sour that I got once). This latte tastes like the coffee has liquid smoke in it. I can only think that they somehow burned the coffee or something. But I am so tired this morning I am drinking this putrid brew anyway. Also it cost me $4, yes you read that right, $4. $4.08 to be exact. Which is more than a Miller Lite at my hometown bar would cost me, but less than a man size Guinness that my husband would order.<br /><br />We are leaving for Vegas on Friday. I can’t wait. Neither of us has ever been to Vegas and honestly I’m not sure if Vegas is going to be my kind of town, but I’m excited to get away. Some of our friends will be there for the weekend so we are going to get a little party time in and then my parents are meeting us there so that will be our more low key time. I got a fun new black dress to wear out. It’s strapless and it was on sale. Both so unlike me.<br /><br />I love travelling. If you hadn’t noticed, we take a lot of vacations and long weekends. I don’t know where I got this bug, but I sure have it. I need to have travel planned or be planning some sort of travel at all times. I’m already thinking about our summer long weekend. I promised Becca we would take her to Mackinac Island and stay at the Grand Hotel sometime and I am thinking this may be the summer to do it. I drug Dave up there a couple years ago and he did not like it. He said it was too hoity toity, but I feel like everyone should stay there at least once. Is 10 too soon for a person to experience this treat? I was 22 or 23 the first time I went there. I remember going to the island with my friend Joddi and her family when we were little girls. They went ever year and stayed at the Iroquois or the Lake View. We used to run around the island (a good place to let your pre-teens go off alone because there isn’t a lot of trouble to be found on an island with no cars) and we would always find our way up to the Grand Hotel and stand there in awe of it. I had seen Somewhere in Time and I wanted to stay so bad. We couldn’t even go in and look at it because they charge you to walk on the porch (okay, yes a little hoity toity). But I love the fact that you have to dress for dinner and that they have a big band lounge where couples ballroom dance. And the grounds are beautiful and it looks almost just like it did in Somewhere in Time. I remember what it was like to be a little girl dreaming of staying there and I want to give that to Becca. Also, she has a book called “Rebecca of Grand Hotel.” There is a painting in the hotel of a little girl named Rebecca and our Rebecca is dying to see it in person instead of just reading about it in a book.<br /><br />Wow, this post has meandered around all over the place. And I have a meeting to go to, so I better wrap it up.<br /><br />What do you think, should I take B to the Grand Hotel or should I make her wait until she is older like I had to?Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-81780243205687847642010-03-18T09:01:00.004-04:002010-03-19T20:20:49.711-04:00Why Dave & I should not take Ambien on the same night (and TMI)Conversation in our bedroom this morning.<br /><br />Dave, "Why don't I have any underwear on?"<br /><br />Me, "I have no idea, I don't remember anything."<br /><br />(Sorry, I warned you about the TMI)Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-20249821721320203752010-03-12T20:26:00.002-05:002010-03-12T20:48:31.465-05:00Another Blue PostI'm so sorry to show back up on the blog to share another bit of terrible news, but this is weighing so heavy on my mind that I have to spew it out somewhere. I struggled as to whether I should even post this, but I think these families could really use your prayers right now.<br /><br />First of all, the kids mom's mom died earlier this week. That was sad because she had been battling cancer for less than a year and she was only 58. So we had to tell the kids about that and it is the first person they have really lost. <br /><br />Then we got some even more tragic news. A former colleague and more importantly, a friend of ours took his own life yesterday morning and I am just broken hearted about it. And Dave is even more broken hearted and beside himself than I am, which breaks my heart even more.<br /><br />Dave has known this man for 15 years and spent a considerable amount of personal and professional time with him. The man had a wife and 5 children ranging from around 13 or so to less than 2. <br /><br />I just can't stop thinking about these 5 babies who have lost their dad and his wife, who is left to raise them alone. I can't stand it and I can't understand why he would do this. We have no details, no answers, no explantions.<br /><br />And my poor husband is now spending four days in a row at funerals as he is at the funeral home tonight for the mom's mom, and the funeral tomorrow morning and then Sunday and Monday at the other funeral. <br /><br />Please say a prayer for this man's family.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-82047931745086415822010-03-05T14:42:00.001-05:002010-03-05T14:43:54.081-05:00A Public Service AnnouncementPeople of the world.<br /><br />Just because something is in fashion does <em>not</em> mean that it looks good on you.<br /><br />Thank you for your time.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-63276490291509973492010-02-22T19:25:00.005-05:002010-02-22T19:32:58.667-05:00Nerd Family Values Part III just overheard my 10 year old ask her friend over the phone,<br /><br />"Who is your favorite president?"<br /><br />I see my history nerd husband is rubbing on her. <br /><br />Which reminds me, I have been meaning to mention this interesting little bit of toilet trivia.<br /><br />My husband is reading a book about Andrew Jackson. Did you know that Andrew Jackson and his wife adopted a baby which was one of twin babies that were born to one of their siblings? Yeah, apparantely twins were such a financial burden that the two women got together and cooked up a scheme arranging for the adoption of only one of the babies. Can you even imagine someone doing something like that now?<br /><br />Yeah, I'm a nerd too.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-85200417808608188162010-02-22T15:50:00.002-05:002010-02-22T16:08:03.324-05:00Snow Day Induced Cabin FeverI am home with the kids today because they had another snow day. I am irritable.<br /><br />Why are kids so gross? I swear one or both of them is either leaking some sort of bodily fluid or disgusting smelling vapors or both at the same time.<br /><br />Really? Blech.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-77941059427933419032010-02-19T08:23:00.001-05:002010-02-19T08:30:26.051-05:00Can someone explain men to me?My husband has been a total grump lately. Granted, he has been under an enormous amount of pressure and stress at work and he has been working like a zillion hours a week, but I don’t get men. When I am really stressed out at work, I love to go home to my man and curl up on the couch with him.<br /><br />It seems like I read Men are from Mars years ago and I remember something about men having to retreat to their cave and how you should leave them alone.<br /><br />Okay, ya’ll, I am not good at the leaving alone thing. Our house isn’t that big, how do I ignore him when he is right there in my face being a BFG (big fat grump). Not to mention, this is the first time in our marriage where I have felt like my husband truly does not like me. And of course, that makes me more henlike.<br /><br />I’m not so self-absorbed to think that this has anything to do with me other than I am there, but it is really bugging me. <br /><br />So do any of you seasoned married ladies have any advice for me on this? How do you support your man through stressful situations when everything that would make you feel better seems to make him grumpier?Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-47714932149830190852010-02-15T20:52:00.006-05:002010-02-15T21:03:47.454-05:00Your Life, My Life, A Reminder<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirczsVQMC2tJ7RSPtGXMzrA4kYHsMGUbGMZ-LWbHUD9sEnr3hnSnJzmP-CtK1g5RNthZdEY-e5LMbtXA0a2k_aTS3HfDIMdovKU3DPnnQa9XyvzhiK7H2NfizyZAIDeT7yFfC14JwsKHg/s1600-h/No+longer.jpg.jpg"><img style="TEXT-ALIGN: center; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 276px; DISPLAY: block; HEIGHT: 400px; CURSOR: hand" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5438654991185907394" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirczsVQMC2tJ7RSPtGXMzrA4kYHsMGUbGMZ-LWbHUD9sEnr3hnSnJzmP-CtK1g5RNthZdEY-e5LMbtXA0a2k_aTS3HfDIMdovKU3DPnnQa9XyvzhiK7H2NfizyZAIDeT7yFfC14JwsKHg/s400/No+longer.jpg.jpg" /></a>This drawing has been hanging in my cubicle since I quit my first real job almost 9 years ago. Many of you will remember that I was in the midst of a personal crisis and quitting that job, while a very uncomfortable proposition, was a necessity. As much as I wanted to stay in my comfort zone, I knew that I had to go. It was the most painful transition of my life.<br /><br />But as it turned out, quitting that job turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made. I could never have imagined at the time how well things would turn out for me in terms of my career and my personal life.<br /><br />I found myself gazing at this drawing this morning and I realized that while I have been staring at it for 9 years, I have stopped seeing it. It is time to move forward, stop looking back and hanging on with desperation to something that is no longer an option. It's uncomfortable and scary, but as in the past, a necessity.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-25820114257163834762010-02-13T22:36:00.004-05:002010-02-13T22:47:00.705-05:00The way things changeTomorrow it will be 6 years since Dave and I started dating (we have been married for almost 4). The date was on a Saturday, so I figure that would actually be tonight. <br /><br />That night we went to dinner and a movie and then back to my place. I think right about now we were sitting on my couch having a beer and talking. We had so much to talk about back then because neither of us had heard each others stories yet. I don't mean that to sound wistful because we still talk a lot, but we have definitely heard each others stories. It is fun to remember the times at the beginning of love when you can't get enough of each other and talk on the phone for hours and the thoughts of that person consume you. <br /><br />Right now Dave is playing Call of Duty with Sam and I am in the office blogging. It is 10:30 on a Saturday night. It's funny how things change.<br /><br />I came home yesterday to find that Dave had purchased me a spa package and scheduled it for tomorrow. So I will be getting a 90 minute massage tomorrow morning followed by a manicure and pedicure. That man has come a long way on his gift giving. I used to have to tell him exactly what to buy for me or he would freak out and not buy my anything (this includes my engagment ring, he was too afraid to pick it out without me)<br /><br />My point is that while it is fun to remember what it was like at the beginning, right now is exactly where I want to be.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-87240165074165977062010-02-09T12:52:00.001-05:002010-02-09T12:53:33.233-05:00Postscript to the Lying BitchDear LB,<br /><br />Now that I have given it some thought, maybe you were right. Maybe I do need to lose 20lbs.<br /><br />I'm going to miss food.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-28401190500325019102010-02-09T12:50:00.000-05:002010-02-09T12:51:19.241-05:00Laundry list<br /><br />First of all, did you know that Panera Bread does not have ranch dressing? Yes, I found this out yesterday. I guess it isn’t cool enough (actually that is me editorializing. I don’t know why they don’t carry it and the 15 year old who was taking my order didn’t have a clue)<br /><br />Second of all, I am t-i-r-e-d today. Mainly because I stayed up past my bedtime on Sunday night and it is now catching up with me. I should have treated myself to a triple this morning, but I wanted to hurry up and get to work before the snow started. I am figuring the kids won’t have school tomorrow and I am planning on staying home with them if that happens.<br /><br />#3 I am dreaming of somewhere warm, and it isn’t Michigan.<br /><br />#4 I am not going to be able to buy new pants for at least a year or however long it takes for the ridiculous skinny legs to go out of fashion again. I refuse to buy them. I refuse, I refuse, I refuse. I hate them and they are ugly and you can call me a fashion reject for saying it. Banana Republic, are you listening to me? All your pants this year are UGLY. Please bring back the wider leg and you could throw some cuffs at me, that would be great. <br /><br />#5 Is it bizarre that we use our grill all year round? Yes I stand in my garage in 10 degree weather and grill.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1191205362671096812.post-62722333173545575972010-02-04T08:42:00.000-05:002010-02-04T08:43:13.254-05:00Work (Again)What am I doing right now? The literal answer to that questions is:<br /><br />I’m sitting at my desk. It is 8:25 a.m. and I am trying to get my day started. There is a space heater buzzing under my desk keeping me feet warm and I don’t know how I would survive without it. It’s pretty quiet in the office still. While I check my e-mail and the morning news, my tiny desk radio is next to me broadcasting my favorite morning show and at the moment I started to type this post it was playing a McDonald’s commercial that is on every morning and it just occurred to me that I am so sick of hearing it. But if I shut the radio off, it is too quiet and I get edgy. I need something to distract me from where I am and what I am doing (literally).<br /><br />What is on my agenda today? Spreadsheets, numbers, revenue forecasts, spreadsheets, forms, numbers, spreadsheets, well, you get the picture, right? Hey, at least I don’t have any meetings today, that is a rarity. So that brings me round to my original question, in a slightly different form.<br /><br />What the fuck am I doing? (Sorry I hope you <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" class="blsp-spelling-error">are not</span> terribly offended by profanity, and if you are, you probably <span id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" class="blsp-spelling-error">would not</span> like me very much.)<br /><br />Okay, what I am saying to myself is in response to my question is, “Quit whining, bitch, and either deal with the career you have made for yourself. Or change it.”<br /><br />So, I am going to change it.<br /><br />More to follow.Melaniehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16615309849866030864noreply@blogger.com3